This is an excerpt of an e-mail I sent to a great artist, and an even greater friend, named Jooyoung Choi. She is about to have an art show in Boston. I am unable to attend of course, what whith being in Japan and all, but I wondered if she felt some tension about the show. So I sent this message to her in the hope that if she did have anxiety, she would be able to release it before the show. The excerpt follows below:
“I don’t know if having this show is creating tension for you, or if it is nerve-wracking at all. If you feel that way, you can always release it. You must be used to showing your stuff, so you might not have any feeling about it at all. But even if the feeling is slight, release it. Try this:
(this is, more or less, a verbatim releasing lesson from Hale Dwoskin)”
One of the topics we explore is that anything that we are afraid of happening, we actually have a subconscious desire for or expectation of happening. Based on this premise, you may find the following exploration helpful for releasing your reactions to what is going on in the world, and for releasing your fears in general.
Make yourself comfortable and focus inwardly. Begin by bringing to mind something about which you feel afraid or anxious—you may want to start with something small—in order to see exactly what it is that you fear is going to happen. Give yourself a moment to notice whether there is a strong feeling of fear at the moment, or a very light hint of fear. It doesn’t matter which it is: simply observe and welcome it.
Now, ask yourself: “Could I let go of wanting this to happen?” or “Could I let go of expecting this to happen?”
The question may have made you laugh. “Oh, come on,” you said. “I don’t actually want this to happen!” Well, try asking the question again, and notice what else you discover. In fact, if you go back to that same thing now, you may already be able to discern a difference. So, focus on that same thing you’re afraid of, or on something else, and we’ll go through a series of questions for releasing fear in this simple way.
What is it that you’re afraid will happen?
What is it you do not want to have happen?
Now, could you let go of wanting that to happen? Could you let go of expecting this to happen? Once you’ve gotten over the shock of the fact that you somehow want a negative thing to happen, it’s often very easy to let go of the fear in this way. Consciously, it’s not truly what you want.
If you get stuck on any particular fear and are having a hard time letting it go, simply switch back to using the regular releasing questions. (EDIT frim Takuin: If you have forgotten the basic releasing questions, I will list them at the end of this e-mail) Check to see which want is stirred up in the moment and let it go, or simply check to see if you want to change that you are having difficulty, and then let go of wanting to change it. Then go back to experimenting with this shortcut.
Again, focus on something that you fear. It could be the same thing or it could be something else. Notice exactly what it is that you’re afraid will happen. If you’re afraid of heights, for instance, underneath it there might really be a fear of falling.
Could you let go of wanting that to happen? Could you let go of expecting this to happen?
Focus again on that same fear, or on something else that you do not want to have happen, on something that you worry about, or on something that makes you nervous. Maybe you have a fear of public speaking. This could include the fear of making a mistake or of seeming like a fool in front of a roomful of people.
Whatever underlying fear you feel: Could you let go of wanting that to happen? Could you let go of expecting this to happen?
Check how you feel inside. Wasn’t it easy to let go in that way? This process will help you clear out the hidden recesses of your subconscious mind. After you release something that you’ve subconsciously wanted to happen, you’ll see a tremendous difference in your life in many areas, including how you feel. Have fun experimenting with this shortcut on your own.
Add this little trick to your toolbox of Sedona Method applications and enjoy the results. It’s great for those occasions when fearful thoughts arise in your consciousness, but you don’t have enough time to do an in-depth process. Whenever you become aware of yourself thinking about an unwanted outcome, simply let go of wanting it to happen by asking yourself the question:
“Could I let go of wanting that to happen?”
As you use the Sedona Method over time you’ll find that the exact situations and experiences that you used to find the most exhausting or disturbing will become less and less so, until you may even forget that you used to have those kinds of experiences.
“That was a bit long, but I think the information is very important, even if it does not apply to how you feel about your show. Release everyday, at any opportunity. Dig deep and find out what is really there. You’ll be surprised when you get there. And I don’t think it will take you very long because your mind is beautiful and works very well. You should be grateful for that.
OK, if you have forgotten the releasing process, here you go:”
Make yourself comfortable and focus inwardly. Your eyes may be open or closed. Step 1: Focus on an issue that you would like to feel better about, and then allow yourself to feel whatever you are feeling in this moment. This doesn’t have to be a strong feeling. In fact, you can even check on how you feel about this exercise and what you want to get from it. Just welcome the feeling and allow it to be as fully or as best you can.This instruction may seem simplistic, but it needs to be. Most of us live in our thoughts, pictures, and stories about the past and the future, rather than being aware of how we actually feel in this moment. The only time that we can actually do anything about the way we feel (and, for that matter, about our businesses or our lives) is NOW. You don’t need to wait for a feeling to be strong before you let it go. In fact, if you are feeling numb, flat, blank, cut off, or empty inside, those are feelings that can be let go of just as easily as the more recognizable ones. Simply do the best you can. The more you work with this process, the easier it will be for you to identify what you are feeling.
Step 2: Ask yourself one of the following three questions:
• Could I let this feeling go?
• Could I allow this feeling to be here?
• Could I welcome this feeling?
These questions are merely asking you if it is possible to take this action. “Yes” or “no” are both acceptable answers. You will often let go even if you say “no.” As best you can, answer the question that you choose with a minimum of thought, staying away from second-guessing yourself or getting into an internal debate about the merits of that action or its consequences. All the questions used in this process are deliberately simple. They are not important in and of themselves but are designed to point you to the experience of letting go, to the experience of stopping holding on. Go on to Step 3 no matter how you answered the first question.Step 3: No matter which question you started with, ask yourself this simple question: Would I? In other words: Am I willing to let go?
Again, stay away from debate as best you can. Also remember that you are always doing this process for yourself—for the purpose of gaining your own freedom and clarity. It doesn’t matter whether the feeling is justified, long-standing, or right.
If the answer is “no,” or if you are not sure, ask yourself: “Would I rather have this feeling, or would I rather be free?”
Even if the answer is still “no,” go on to Step 4.
Step 4: Ask yourself this simpler question: When?
This is an invitation to just let it go NOW. You may find yourself easily letting go. Remember that letting go is a decision you can make any time you choose.
Step 5: Repeat the preceding four steps as often as needed until you feel free of that particular feeling.
You will probably find yourself letting go a little more on each step of the process. The results at first may be quite subtle. Very quickly, if you are persistent, the results will get more and more noticeable. You may find that you have layers of feelings about a particular topic. However, what you let go of is gone for good.
If any of you are in Boston and inclined to artistic expression, go to her show on Sunday. For info, click the link to her site on the left.
Sorry I cannot be there, Jooyoung!
Takuin Minamoto
2 Comments
Takuin, thanks for another great article. I haven’t done any work wit The Sedona Method before. I may just have to give in and buy the material now that you have shown me some of the exercises. When I get a chance, I am going to sit down with my son who has panic attacks and see if he can do some releasing work using this method. Thanks.
No problem, Patricia. It can be a powerful method for some.
I plan on putting up some links to that site, but have no yet had the opportunity to do so. I will get to it before too long.
Thanks for your comments!
Takuin