Message to a Friend – Letting Go

The Thinker Side

In response to a friend that asked about ‘Letting Go’ as a path to freedom.

There is a subtle voice in letting go that says, “Things need to change. If I let this go, my life will be better.” But it is a mere projection of a non-existent state. Although one is ‘letting go,’ it may still be a trick of the controller. In other words, one would not ‘let go’ unless they felt something was wrong in the first place. But there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You lack nothing.

The only state you have, is the one you are in. If you feel fearful, it is a fact. It is confusing to try and find a “better state.” To sit with what is present – the fear – and work from there, is all one can really do.

All of this – whatever feelings you may have, good or bad – is your greatest teaching. It is better than anything anyone else may hand to you. All of the answers are present within you. But you must begin with what you have, and not with what you think is better.

You may need strength to sit with it and see it. You may need great determination to see it through, but this is your journey to take. And whatever is within you – even if it seems to bring pain – is truly a gift.

You know, there is that saying, “What you resist persists.” But also, it is this resistance that helps point you toward your greatest freedom. It is all very exciting to be where you are. You might not believe it, but it is true.

It seems you take this seriously, and that is a very positive step. But you will also need curiosity to see it to the end. There is a great energy present within curiosity. And while it might not eliminate fearful feelings, it makes it all so much easier to deal with.

When you are curious, there is a great movement toward finding out; you are not so interested in a specific result as much as you are in finding out what is really there. And seeing the truth of what is present is stronger and more final than any fear that resides within thought.

12 thoughts on “Message to a Friend – Letting Go”

  1. A sad thing about life is that when you meet someone who means a lot to you and only to find out in the end that it was never bound to be and you just have to let go..

  2. your insights helped me a lot in deciding what to do. i have not spoken to a friend for nearly four months now. i decided to let go. the more i plan to let go, the more things becomes complicated. Resistance is really futile.

    1. tin,

      That is a wonderful insight to have for yourself. And I appreciate that you say Takuin has helped you. But in the end, as you may well know, it is all in your hands.

      This whole movement, if we can call it that, is something that may be appearing in several ways throughout your everyday life. If it is hard to let go of something that was an ‘insult’ to who you are, then this will not be an isolated event.

      I encourage you to look even deeper, to find that source, the thing that makes the whole thing possible. I won’t tell you HOW to do it, but I will tell you it is there.

      You can find it if you are interested. Teach yourself how and you’ll never need a guru.

      Thank you, and feel free to comment on anything you may see here, no matter who has written it.

  3. Great reminder! The wanting to let go, and letting go are two different experiences. Letting go seems to happen only after complete acceptance, without the lurching for it to be any different. It’s a delicate lesson, and it took me quite some time. Often, when we learn a healing/release technique, it doesn’t seem to work. Once we completely accept what we are feeling, without the movement or expectation to change it, the technique is no longer a technique and it suddenly and naturally works.

    “When you are curious, there is a great movement toward finding out; you are not so interested in a specific result as much as you are in finding out what is really there.” Beautiful!

  4. Many thanks for the quick response Takuin, I’m starting to understand my curiosity. I guess there si still a lot of things that I just thought they just were like that in a very automatic way.

    I’m very happy that a lot of questions arise lately.

  5. Alejandro,

    …we think of curiosity as the force to find without searching? Or perhaps something more specific as searching without the need for the result that will satisfy our mind?

    Perhaps more like your second question. I have used the word to mean an ‘eagerness to discover,’ but it is not a search for what is already known to you. In other words, it is not a search where you hope to find something close to what you already believe to be true.

    One must be prepared for the possibility of complete and total destruction. What one might discover could end everything. And that is the beauty of this curiosity; it is out of this destruction that something new is born.

    It is destroyed and reborn at every possible moment.

    But in the “end” curiosity can and will lead us into the truth? Is this truth a way to the “peace of the mind” where it doesn’t need to label everything?

    Ah, you are treading in slightly dangerous waters here. Is that why you want to be curious – to find your specific desire? Are you projecting what you hope awaits you there? If Alejandro is in a place where the mind needs to label everything, then that is the truth. That is the fact. You start with what you have there NOW, and not with what you hope to have later.

    Sorry I may ask a lot of questions here, but I find that Takuin can bring a bit of light into a very interesting topic.

    Oh please…you are welcome to say what you want and explore these things as you see fit. All of us, the regular commenters and the lurkers, are glad to have you here.

  6. I’m trying to understand a bit here, we think of curiosity as the force to find without searching? Or perhaps something more specific as searching without the need for the result that will satisfy our mind?

    It’s also very interesting to think of resistance as a way to point us out to the result that can only be found by our curiosity. But in the “end” curiosity can and will lead us into the truth? Is this truth a way to the “peace of the mind” where it doesn’t need to label everything?

    Sorry I may ask a lot of questions here, but I find that Takuin can bring a bit of light into a very interesting topic.

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