This question comes from Janice through gmail:
Do you have any advice or suggestions for someone (me) who is going through addiction withdrawal? I am in nicotine withdraw and it is not pretty. I am receiving acupuncture therapy and it helps more than someone would believe. I am attempting to “sit with” the craving episodes but the cravings seem relentless at this point. I cannot fight this. I will not win. Breathing helps. I would appreciate any suggestions.
Thank you,
Janice
Thank you for the question, Janice.
First I want to say that I tried replying to you through email, but it was rejected by your domain repeatedly for some reason. We may have these problems in the future, and if we do, you may want to contact me through Twitter if it keeps happening.
Thanks for your message…
I smoked for about 10 years or so, but I doubt the story of how I quit would be very useful to you. When I stopped, it was probably around 1999, and it took nothing more than a serious decision to quit. For me, it was as if I turned off a light switch. It was off.
I can clearly remember only one time when I wanted a cigarette, meaning, had a serious craving for one, and that was probably a few weeks after I stopped. But really, the only difficulty I discovered was I felt something was missing from between my fingers.
It was strange…I didn’t need a cigarette, but I needed something between my fingers, haha. I would carry a pen and twiddle it from time to time…
Fresh Air
Withdrawal from quitting smoking is really a minor thing. You probably do not believe that, as you may be within that feeling right now. But the urge, the physical urge itself, is rather minor. The problem arises from your thoughts of the urges, and not necessarily the urge itself.
That is not to diminish the urge, because that is very real. But what you want to sit with is your thinking of the urge, and how it arises. If you can see the urge as it is, without your commentary, it will lose its power.
Cravings are not relentless; only your thought is relentless. You may not believe any of this, but that is not necessary anyway. You are doing the right thing looking within, but you may trust yourself too much as the judge of observation.
I cannot fight this. I will not win.
Then you will not. It is that simple.
Thank you for your time, Janice. If you have any more questions, or if you’d just like to give an update in the near future, please don’t hesitate.
Takuin
***************
If any of you have advice for Janice on how you quit smoking, please post it here in the comments. I am interested in hearing those stories, as well. 
{ 16 comments }
I’m wondering Janice if you know what smoking played in your life. What is your equivalent to Takuin wanting something between his fingers. It sounds like it may be a much bigger thing than that. If you know this, you can perhaps find the equivalent of something to twiddle between your fingers that is not a cigarette.
Nicely put, Takuin! I used to smoke as well, and I agree, it’s the thinking that causes the problem. Funny, but isn’t that the case with EVERYTHING? Thinking. And who’s doing the thinking…? Ha! No, don’t answer that. I’m still trying to figure that one out. Havin’ a helluva time about it, too.
Anyway, Janice, if it helps, I wrote about my final quitting episode if you care to read: http://msayers.wordpress.com/2008/02/08/how-i-stopped-smoking/
Thanks, Takuin. Merry Christmas!
Mike
Hi Janice,
I smoked for about 30 years and finally Champix (in Germany)/Chantix (in the US) by Pfizer helped: http://bit.ly/gEIgbc
Not very spiritual but it stopped the craving. I started with 0,5 mg, ate my way up to 2 mg and then back. It took four weeks, the desire to smoke vanished after 10 days, I am smokefree for three and a half years now.
Good luck to you,
Tokumei
Best wishes to Janice. I hoe you’d be able to quit smoking soon.
Takuin, a happy journey to Akiko and you. Merry Christmas!
Thanks to everyone for sharing their stories…I hope this is useful to Janice in quitting smoking.
Happy holidays to everyone! Be good, and stay safe out there.
TM
“If you can see the urge as it is, without your commentary, it will lose its power.” — how true, how simple, and how profound. Thank you for that.
I quit smoking a few years ago. Takuin gives great advice: watch and allow, and you see that the physical urges are not that big. It’s the thinking that builds up.
My advice:
1. try Rational Recovery, by Jack Trimpey (http://rational.org)
2. A release method, like the one I have or the Sedona Method
3. Patches or gum or Zyban or other meds
And thank you, Tina and Kaushik, for your comments and insights…
Hello!
I myself quit smoking almost 4 months ago and totally agree that it’s the thoughts that create the problem, the ‘I want a cigarette’ which is triggered by an almost imperceptable vague physical feeling, which when you focus on it, you realize is quite mild.
I strongly recommend Allen Carr’s ‘Easy way to Stop Smoking’ should you wish to read more about this.
Keep it up!
chris
Thanks, Chris! And I’m sure Janice thanks you as well….
“I cannot fight this. I will not win.”
If you truly lacked the strength, the craving would have no force. The craving is you. Your power. Use it as fuel to fire your will, not another cigarette. Let craving serve you as reminders of your choice rather than as self torment. Cravings are evidence that you’re you’re winning!
Everyone’s experience with this is different. For some it is easy, for others pure hell. Heroin addicts have said cigarettes were harder to quit. If it’s a fight for you, be sure you’re on the right side* so your energy is not counterproductive.
FWIW – I smoked for something like 17 years, and stopped nearly that long ago. It was not “easy”, but I refused to label it as hard either (assigning a level of difficulty is a form of self deception). My quitting was not like what most describe. *- I simply(or not so – but again, why place judgment on this?) took an honest look at WHY I smoked. How many REALLY do this? What I saw was a self-destructive and self-hating nature I was repressing – and acting out via cigarettes. The whole thing was compounded by the nicotine being self medication for depression/anxiety (plus some high functioning autism and ADD if I want to borrow labels). It was rather effective for that. TOO effective. Outwardly I was more “normal” and sociable as a smoker, but at what cost? On seeing all this clearly for the first time, I was angry at myself and my “weakness” in being controlled by a chemical. I used that in the fight. This then led to compassion/understanding/acceptance, and soon there was no fight.
Quitting still stands as one thing I actually managed to get control of. I have often wished I had that sort of clarity/resolve/ability to re-frame things in all aspects of my life (and wondering what the difference is). Now, I am not so concerned with “control”, as who is controlling who? *L*
Closing thought: There is a MUCH simpler route. Simply set all this aside. Add this to the list of things you used to do but don’t any longer (like being sustained vi an umbilical cord, soiling your diaper, crawling…).
K,
That is a great reply! I’m sure it will be a great help to Janice in quitting smoking. Thanks so much for your insights…
I remember the days when I smoked, actually along side of Takuin, we would share a smoke while enjoying music, watching him and his brother playing music or just plain hanging out. While my addiction didn’t end until 4 years after his, mine was hard for me to break as a social thing. I used “the patch” which cured my physical addition but it wasn’t untill I adjusted my social behaviours that I won the battle. Good luck in reaching your goal, there is no one way for us all, everyone is an individule and must apply what is needed in their own special situation to cure their addictions.
Thanks, Shawn. And sorry I didn’t respond sooner…I usually receive a notification about comments here, but for some reason I missed a few last month.
I remember those days, but very little detail survives in my memory. I need a catalyst to ‘activate’ those memories, for lack of a better phrase. Maybe someday soon we’ll sit down and you can remind me of all the nonsense we got into.
Well, this is so strange. I was spring cleaning my bookmarks and I found you, Takuin. I am so glad that I “kept” you. I was milling around noticing how interesting your topics are. And I noticed that someone had requested help to stop smoking and manage cravings. I kept reading and noticed it was me.
I appreciate that you tried to contact me. I have read all the support comments and I can say that I found a lot of truth in them, from my experience.
Well, the acupuncture experience was a mixed bag. I gained a lot of confidence that I could live my life without smoking. However, I did not completely quit. I reduced my smoking greatly, but did not quit at that time. That was in December 2010.
Well, today is 43 smoke free days! I flunked out of acupuncture therapy, but, so what. Every experience really is a step to the next opportunity. I did what I knew I would never do. I joined a support group for losers like me and dragged my smoking guyfriend with me. I thought I knew what to expect and I thought this is going to be terrible. Well, I had no idea how wonderful the other people in group were going to be. I have met the most supportive, helpful and interesting people who understand exactly what I am saying and how it feels to change your life in such a dramatic way. 17 of us started in the group three months ago and tomorrow night we graduate together. there will be 7 of us, smoke free. For those of us that enjoy stats, that is almost 50% success rate! Amazing.
Someone said it’s not the craving, it’s how you/your body/your emotions, etc. react to it. That comment is exactly right, in my case. The feelings, thought patterns and behaviors around the craving are so startling. The cravings are managable, it’s the associated baggage that will kick my ass.
Thank you for putting the word out. Who knows, maybe this collective good thought, got me to the next step.
Sincerely,
Janice
P.S. for anyone still smoking, seriously, if I can not smoke today anyone can not smoke today. it is doable.
take my word for it, I was a professional smoker. Smoked for over 30 years, only took a break to have two babies, long, long ago.
P.S.S. the acupuncture might of worked for me, but it would of left Butch (guyfriend) out of that loop. This group welcomed us both and we have stopped smoking together, same day, same time.
Janice,
Welcome! I’m glad to see you were able to find my message to you. I wondered if you would ever get it with the troubles I had with email.
43 days! That is great…well, it is a few more than that by now, but I trust everything is moving smoothly for you.
And I want to also say thanks to everyone that left their suggestions and advice on this post for Janice. It is all wonderful and quite useful.
Thanks again, Janice. I hope to see you here in the future.
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