November Project: Question #15
This question comes from ‘A’ on the original November Project post.
Takuin, when you see a flower, you see a flower. When you see a tree you see a tree. You say all of us have the capacity, the potential to see things totally, that it doesn’t take much, that it’s like breathing. That may be true but how many human beings actually see this possibility turning real in their lives?
‘How many people actually see it‘ is not the right question. That is insignificant. Do you see it? That is of real importance in this life. You are the only ONE.
If you want to understand what it is human beings find important, just look out into the world. It is plain to see. But if you want to know how you are functioning; how to live, how to love, how to die; look to yourself first.
The smallest light can obliterate the darkness.
I don’t see a flower, a tree, nature the way you do, though I really want to.
Do you want to see the flower, or do you want to see the flower like Takuin? Do you understand the difference? (I am not saying you do want to see it in that way…we’re just exploring.)
If you see the flower like Takuin, that is no different from how you see the flower now, and it is frustrating to you. Your ‘inability’ to see the flower is no different from your wanting to see it through the eyes of another.
If you see the flower like Takuin, you’ll be blind. If you see the flower on your own, you’ll never again ask how to see the flower.
Nothing gives me peace.
We are all grateful to you, A, because you are teaching us valuable lessons…
You are quite right. Nothing will give you peace. However, this is not because you are deficient in some way. Have you ever stopped to ask, “Is peace – the kind I hope to have – something that can be given to me?”
We’re not talking about the peace of physical security, or the knowledge that your basic needs will be taken care of, at least for some time. We are talking about peace, down to the heart, down to the cell, down to the core, or however one might put it. Is this something that can be given to you?
Is this something you can take?
Nothing Gives Me Peace
Isn’t it true that you see the way you do because of the accident? Why is there such an unfair balance between people who can see and those who can’t?
‘An unfair balance between‘…this is interesting to me…
How does this arise within you? The imbalance between those that have, and those that have not…is it the same as rich and poor? Popular and unpopular? Intelligent and stupid? Do you see yourself as someone who has been wronged in some way because other people seem to have what you think you do not?
How does this arise in you? Follow it as best you can, and please describe it to us. I feel there is something very valuable there, for all of us.
It’s as if those who can see came here to truly live. Why indeed should people who live in frustration or misery live?
What are you doing, if not living? Does life seem empty only because you want it to be different from what it is?
There is a very strong center within you, protecting, attacking, wanting to have this, wanting to avoid that, but what is that center?
Why is the center frustrated? Not that he or she should or should not be. But why? And not ‘because‘. There is something deeper than outward circumstance.
How do you see this?
***************
Please, A, feel free to comment below. There is much we can learn from what you have said, and what you have asked, but it is not enough for Takuin to just speak. We need you here as well.
If the two of us can talk and explore, we might be able to come to something beautiful. An openness others might be able to benefit from.
I look forward to hearing from you…
{ 12 comments }
Those are such rich questions, and the feeling is so strong, and the focus so clear. Thank you A.
Well said, Evan.
Thank you so much Takuin for the answer. All I can say is that i will write a detailed response after some time. I don’t grudge your peace, only I want more of it in everyone’s hearts, mine and others. More later… Thanks!!
a,
I know your situation, and understand completely. Take your time and get back when you can.
That is lovely…
Thanks Evan for your thoughts.
I had genuinely hoped that peace, down to the heart, down to the cell, down to the core could be given. If it’s only left to me, to access my peace from my deepest core, then that’s going to be difficult. To cut through the clutter and reach the silence, to be patient with the resistance and the avoidance of the resistance, would be like to be patient with a battle.
Whatever is deeper than outward circumstance is a stranger at this moment. Outer is everything right now. I would be lying if I say that my quest for peace is not borne out of the general difficulties of life. I know that I am much more fortunate than many human beings. But that’s poor consolation. Another peson’s suffering cannot bring peace. Also, somtimes this wanting peace and these questions make me feel like a spoilt brat. There are so many people who are struggling to survive, and here I am asking questions. What good are they?
I don’t want to see things the way you do. By that I meant seeing things totally: not be clouded by anxious or distracting thoughts while seeing a tree or a flower. My relationship with whatever I see is so incomplet because there are hundred other things going on in my mind.
Thank you, a.
From the way you speak, you know what goes on within you. You know the tricks, the games, and probably some of the traps. You have a great deal of knowledge of yourself, and yet, this activity does not stop. Why do you suppose this is?
Sometimes thought is a rising crescendo. It builds and builds, and you have no idea what will happen when it reaches the highest point, or even if there is a highest point. But when you are there, and cacophonous, what will you do? Look to someone else? You cannot keep looking away to see what is right in front of you…right inside of you.
At some point you will have to go through it. Really go through it. Not just see it, then run for the hills. Every time, when you reach that point and you run away, you are not going through it, no matter how emotionally taxing it may feel. It is just a game of sorts. That does not meant it isn’t serious, because it is. But you may have to confound yourself at every turn in order to come to a new place…
Don’t talk about how difficult it might be, or how much of a battle you’ll have to endure. You’ll never know what might be required. Even on the other side, it is doubtful you will know anything about it.
Something else you might want to explore within yourself…if you think it is difficult, and if you believe you’ve struggled with all of this – and maybe you have struggled for years – has that difficulty become important to you? In other words, are you so invested in being a seeker that finding the peace you seek could destroy the person you think you have become?
What would happen if you stopped seeking?
I’m glad I came across this page again…I really needed to read this.
When I try to give up the search, or let go of dreaming about an ideal future, in order to face what is in front of me: dissatisfaction with my work situation or my lack of inspiration to produce anything, that’s when the restlessness and confusion start building up inside of me. That’s when I feel the urge to run away and look for help–for answers–to the question of “what can I do?” This inevitably puts me right back into seeking mode, but still, there is this feeling that I have to do something about my situation, otherwise it will never change. It is often hard to tell whether the impulse to move is truly “authentic”–if that is the right word–or if it is just another mind trick.
I don’t know what Takuin thinks. The thing that occurs to me is to pay attention to the ‘have to’. Sit with it and get to know it. This may stop you getting back into the doing automatically.
Thank you, Sarah…
Evan is right on. He says, “pay attention to the ‘have to’.” I’ll say, the mystery of the movement, is the movement itself. (The movement being your description of the way you behave.)
If you are looking for an ‘answer’ to this movement, the movement itself will provide the answer.
thank you for this question, a, and for everyone’s responses. i feel as though i could have written every word of the question myself. somehow very comforting to read because of this.
i have felt ‘stuck’ and ‘removed’ somehow since i was a child. i used to look at others and wonder how they did it, how they seemed to be less confused or more comfortable in their own skin. i still feel this way to some degree most of the time.
i feel like something is wrong, like there is something i’m just not ‘getting’. the feeling remains regardless of outward circumstances, but also, of course, very much affects what shows up in my outward circumstances. i see it all. i,too, see the games and i continue trying to do battle. intellectually, oneness is all that rings true but it generally remains an intellectual understanding. and i know others who do not have to fight these battles – life seems much more effortless. i know it’s silly to compare but difficult not to take notice.
also, people who have wrestled with similar demons, called out for help and received an answer. i never have, to my knowledge. a few experiences of massive expansion and love have left me wondering why i can’t reside there, or at least somewhere a little closer to there than here:)
Thank you, B, for your great comment.
Have these feelings continued since the time you posted this comment?
Do you still feel you don’t get it? Well, that is alright if you do. I suspect the answer lies within your words. It may be nothing more than your need to find the answer, in lieu of seeing yourself as you are.
You may have seen a problem, but if you go off looking for who might have the answer, or re-design your life to emulate the actions of people that are there, instead of truly seeing how this activity goes on within you, then it is quite possible you’ve not seen the real problem.
How do you see this, b?
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