I have received a few similar questions over the last week. This is one of them, but captures the gist of all of them:
I’ve been reading your recent posts, and the spirituality series at Tom Stine’s blog as well. But I have a question. I have never really thought about spirituality before and wonder how I should start. I hear about meditation and mindfulness, and the things some people do for spirituality, but after reading your posts and comments, and Tom’s posts and comments, I am beginning to think that those things don’t really matter so much.
So, where do I begin? Where did you begin?
I don’t really consider that I have done the “spiritual journey” that others speak of. I think I always suspected something else was available, but could never trust that someone else could tell me what it was.
I started with doubt. It is difficult to remember now, but I guess I thought that if I didn’t rely on anything another person handed to me, I would have to see the truth eventually. But nothing changed until I became curious.
It was curiosity that really allowed me to let go of the goal. Curiosity, in its own way, eliminates the seeker. It is very subtle, but if you are truly curious, it has less to do with the outcome as it does the moment by moment exploration.
I wrote a slightly different view in another blog post.
If you decide to get into this remember:You can go here and there, listen to him and her, read this and that, but none of that really matters. In the end you have to find out for yourself, without reliance on authority.
There will be only your own tracks in the sand. But even these will be obliterated behind you.
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Great answer to the question. I believe that we each start wherever we are and go from there. It really is different for each of us. For me, it didn’t become a spiritual journey until I was able to look back and see where I had been.
Everything you say, Takuin, is quite true. And yet, I’m going to take a different view. Depending on the person, they may need to do some seeking first. It may be what is appropriate for them. Sometimes the seeker ends only after seeking. Whatever it takes for surrender to occur. So, maybe for some, meditation or inquiry would be a good start. Of course, you curiosity is a form of inquiry, is it not?
Great to see you again Patricia. It is quite true that we all start in the same place, yet at the same time, it is vastly different.
We all begin where we are, and that is exactly the same for all of us. But the particular “where we are,” is always different.
But I have found that the difference is not as important as the where we are.
Thanks for the comment!
Hey Tom…are you typing from the retreat? I guess a keyboard is silent enough.
I suppose in the end, there is really no way of knowing what will occur. The seeker may end during the course of meditation, but did it end because of the meditation, or did it just happen to occur that way? There is no way of knowing.
That is the difficult thing to try and explain: if you ask someone that is awakened, “When did it happen?” that is most likely easy to answer. But if you ask, “What caused it to happen?” that becomes a bit more difficult.
You are right that the curiosity is in itself a kind of inquiry. The main difference, it seems, is that it isn’t fixated on an end result. It is more of a moment by moment exploration of whatever.
In true curiosity, there is no pre-conceived idea or conclusion. If one investigates through a conclusion, there is no curiosity. Hell, for that matter, there is no investigation, either.
If one is fixated on the idea of meditation being the way to go, they should probably go ahead and do it. They can always sort out the investigation through that movement. Whether or not they will, remains to be seen, but that can be said of anything.
How is the weather @ the retreat?
Retreat starts tomorrow evening. I’m in San Jose, CA, enjoying some pre-silence silence, aka, a hotel at the airport! And doing a few emails, etc.
I completely agree with you, AGAIN! There is no way you can know what causes anything. I would only say that one should do what one feels “drawn” to do. That is probably moving in the right direction. I feel drawn to sit mostly, just sit, and be aware of what is aware. And I write down beliefs and allow them to evaporate. That’s what draws me. Or at times, what I push myself to do.
It can be a 2 edged sword, to be sure.
Drawn to do…for some reason that phrase is compelling. I’ll go into it and see what arises. If it is interesting, I may post the findings.
The writing of beliefs for the purposes of investigation can be powerful for many people. That is something that Byron Katie always recommends, because the mind can be tricky in how it softens thoughts in order to make them seem less poisonous.
On paper, it may be easier to see the wolf in sheep’s clothing.
Yes, if you and I keep agreeing, people will think we are in cahoots.
I am curious as to where all this rhetoric leads…what is the perpetual result that we are after. How does this tie into the lives of some many others? I see the upward spiraling staircase of the human spirit, but what is it all for?…where does it lead? I only come up with more questions because it seems that we are going around in this insatiable circle. Tell me how has your life changed and for what purpose do you do what you do?
I have heard that a lot, and in the past, that was where my mind lived. I always wanted to know where everything went. “Where does it lead, what is the purpose, what will happen?” etc. Eventually, it became clear that where one is holds more weight than the imaginary place one may go. You are never where you are going; you are only where you are.
It is very easy to say and, for that matter, easy to understand. But that is not enough.
It could lead anywhere, but really that is just an idea. We’ll never know until we are there, but when that happens we are not there but here.
The most important question might be How does it affect you? Do you have some feeling of yearning, or a desire to be more than you are? A feeling of living in a shell, as if somehow you are incomplete and not whole?
Where are you, and where is your mind? Where do you feel it can go? Are you sure that it can go anywhere? If you are not sure about any of this, then it is your responsibility to find out. No one can give it to you.
When you ask how it has changed, do you mean has it gotten better or worse? Or do you mean are things perceived differently? I am not sure how to answer the question.
The original purpose of this website was to find a way to communicate this thing to others. As far as that goes, I am not at all satisfied that it has happened.
I do write a lot, even though I don’t post it all. I would say 10 to 20 percent of what I write makes it to this blog. And I do speak a lot, even if there is no one to hear it.
I don’t really see it as much of a purpose, as in “My Purpose is to blank.” It is just something that happens from time to time, as strange as that may sound.
I think I have to agree with Tom. For most of us, some seeking is needed. Occasionally, people will awaken spontaneously, without apparent cause. But for most people, there is some sort of underlying process. A process that will only be, as Patricia suggested, apparent in retrospect. The process then has the semblance of path. A path that will be unique for each of us.
Speaking about where one is or seems to be, as you do, has great value for people in your area of progress. Another view of what is.
But for someone still captured by the image, the story, it is a foreign land with little to relate to. This is why many teachers speak of the process. Tole suffered then woke. Adya practiced Zen. Others followed a tradition, did service, yoga, or meditation. Perhaps psychotherapy or diad or inquiry. Many are the ways to where we already are (laughs).
As you observe, its true that cause is harder to answer. Mainly because it is such a complex weave of Self emerging, individual opening and all of it arising from the one through the many. Drawn indeed, that pull of surrender. And unique for each of us.
But I do place value in the process and the study of the evolution of perspective or consciousness. It does help people see the path and get a sense of where they’re going and why it has value.
Nonetheless, I love your posts. They illuminate aspects that are not always seen.
Tom Stine’s wonderful list brought me here
*smile* I’m excited to read alot more on this site.
Thanks, Jemi. Glad to have you here.
You have a great site, by the way.
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