I have tried to envision the world from your perspective. And your perspective from my perspective is:
You see that people see glimpses of enlightenment, and they "know" it. But we are so fondly attached to our human-ness that we can't, don't want to, or just decide to not "let go" of that part of ourselves.
Well, not only that, but when one catches the glimpse, it is impossible to hang onto it.
There is a certain recurring tendency; one has the experience and immediately wants it to continue, so one remembers the feeling and starts chasing the memory of the thing, which is not the actual thing one might have experienced.
It is just one of those strange things...it is for the best to not care if that feeling continues or not. Once you chase the memory, you are out of it, and one just goes from feeling to feeling trying to capture the original.
If you really look at this, you can see the issue. The original feeling was beyond memory. In other words, you did not have to do anything to experience it, and you didn't even know whether or not it might be important at all. But once you hope to capture it, you are out of it.
Liberation is not about recapturing the 'right' feeling, or following a specific set of rules or regulations. It is beyond all of that.
Maybe for you it wasn't a choice? You see how beautiful human beings are from the outside. I feel like I see how beautiful being human is from the inside.
Not a choice, yes...
On the one hand, it is like walking a rickety wooden bridge and one of the slats breaks. You can hop over it with no problem. You can even go back. Nothing has really changed, apart from being able to see the ground a bit easier.
But the other hand is like crossing the bridge successfully, then it breaks behind you, completely destroyed. There is no going back...
This doesn't change the beauty inherent in all living things, but you will see it without question. It removes the interference once keeping you blind.
…but I know the world you see is the one I will ultimately know … and I guess I’m just holding on as long as I can, because once I am there, I will not be here anymore.
I suppose you can put it that way. You will not be there any longer. But that does not mean you'll be careless, or devoid of anything apart from your own 'interference' with life, if that is the right way to put it.
Most of us will live somewhat long lives before death arrives. It is probably for the best that we keep moving forward, and not hide ourselves in old, pleasing memories of what once was.
Thanks for your interaction and your seriousness...