Why do you think the accident [regarding awakening ~ TM] happened to you?
Thanks for your question, A.
I don't see it as something that 'happened to me'.
There are beginnings and endings throughout life. They happen to you all the time, even if you cannot see them. Perhaps it was nothing more than that.
Enlightenment will never 'happen to you'. That is not what it is. It is not like getting a raise at work, nor is it like winning the lottery.
It is the wind touching your face. The baby crying in the street. All the things you love, and all the things you hate.
It is all the reasons you want to leave. It is all the reasons you want to stay. It is all of your regret, and all that you have let go.
It is the first time you cried in sorrow. It is the first time you smiled with joy. It is the friends you see everyday, and the friends you will never see again.
It is all you've ever wanted. It is all you've never wanted. It is the first time you held your mother's hand, and it is also the last.
If you've been looking for something to happen to you, and you've only met with frustration, why not take a break? Or stop altogether...
Live your beautiful life while you have the chance. The necessary components are already present within you. ;-)